Where did this come from and please let it go!!!!

Depair, Darkness, Depression, Saddness, Hopelessness, Terrified, Unknown, Unworthy, Pain, Why me, Anger and those are to just name a few.

As you can see this is not going to be one of those happy go luck post, in fact I don't even know wy I am doing this here. I have to get this out and I figure here better than some of the other places it could go. I am not doing this for your sympathy, disapproval, approval, opinion, or anything else. If you want to encourage me than that fine but I can't handle much else right now.

Last week I knew something was really out of wack I would be literally burning up and freezing at the same time. I could cry at the drop of a hat and I couldn't eat anything, it was 4 days before I had realized I hadn't had anything to eat. So I made the dreaded appointment with the ole Dr. That morning I told one of my co-workers I thought I was going crazy. She just kindof laughed me off and told me to go get checked out. Did I mention I was having migrained daily.

So when I get there and the Doctor comes in the room the first thing I said to him was before I say anything else I really am not crazy. I have been seeing him for 11 years and so he knows me really well and he says I know your not crazy what's going on. I stated I feel like I am crazy. Then I told him that I was having visual distubances, hearing things, freezing and burning up at the same time, exhausted but couldn't sleep, only getting about 3 to 4 hours of sleep per night, joints were hurting and my stomach was burning everytime I put anything in it.

He told me that my thyroid medication wasn't working and that my thyroid was causing everything which had caused me to go into a severe depression, severe axiety, so I got a new pill for my thyroid, a pill for the depression, a pill for the axiety, a pill for my stomach and I still can't eat, I have lost 6 pounds this week. All I want to do is sleep that it, it is so hard to stay awake, I feel like I walk around with my eyes shut and that is without any medication.

My family is worried I understand that but I don't know what to do to fix this. It isn't somethis I caused it was a genuine medical condition that brought all of this on. There are time that I cannot even deal with my kids now because their fighting brings on suck major axiety /panic attacks. They don't understand this, they are just kids. God please help me! I just want to be normal again, please!